Idol Worship

Here's the problem with American Idol: The audition phase is kind of the best part, because it's before you hear someone kill a song you love, and it's fun to hear people for the first time. But in two hours last night, I think they showed six good singers. In a singing talent show. They showed at least 5 times as many crap ones. It's ridiculous! No one is that into schaedenfraude, are they? I know we like to see things that make us feel better about ourselves, but would we feel so much worse if we actually had to watch people with talent on a talent show? And there's so much making fun just to make fun. It's awful. I guess people like to see that kind of stuff, but what kind of assholes are we that we want to see people get butchered for doing something that we supposedly love? Also, please tell me that it's not possible that so many people are so deluded about where their talents lie. These are people who just want to be on television, right? Not people who actually think they can sing? And their families really don't hate them that much? Because you'd have to hate someone a lot to hear them sound like a goat in a blender and encourage them to audition. So even though I sort of love AI, I think it's making me losing my faith in humanity.

Sub-problem: Ryan Seacrest. He's a robot, right? I mean, no one's really that tan and plasticine, right? I'm afraid.